July 11, 2013 | No comments yet

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by:  Staci Stallings

Obviously I think words are important.  In fact, when I took the Love Languages quiz, guess what my number 1 love language is.

And the flip side of that is this… guess which love language is on the bottom of my husband’s list!

So maybe that’s where today’s lesson comes from.  A certain percentage of the population treasures words more than the rest.  In fact, good words deposited in their account can literally allow them to breathe.

Conversely, harsh words can shut them down and send them into depression or worse.

Without taking the quiz, you can do something about this by using your words positively instead of using them to run others down.  This will help with anyone.  With a person who is “word-dominate,” it is even more important.

So, how do you do this?

Well, if you are the word-giver, I like to think of it as becoming a cheerleader for others.  Even if you can’t do a cartwheel or the splits, you can lift others up just by how you speak to them.  Focus on giving encouragement.  Focus on what they have done right.  Focus on saying what would inspire you.

For me, because words are just not my husband’s forte, I have had to work to build my own network of word cheerleaders.  These are friends who will talk to me and encourage me when I’m tired, weary, or otherwise in need of a word-boost.

Especially if you are a word-person, don’t wait to build this network.  Do it NOW!

Connect, and stay connected.  Converse with them, even if that means just online through email.

It was in finally building this network that I stopped feeling so alone.  Before, I would be here at my house by myself (with my very young children) all day long.  Calls to my family were long-distance, and spending the money to call them seemed frivolous.  Husband was out of town working during the day and would come home at night tired and having used up all of his words on others during the day.

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Awful is a good word to describe that time of life for me.  I was like a plant in soil that was not being watered.  I would suck every shred of “word water” out of situations that I could.  Often I would come home hoarse from talking so much during outings.

If you see yourself at all in this scenario, please know that you are not a bad person for needing someone to talk with.  You may be a word person too, and you NEED those words just like a plant needs the water.  And just because those closest to you don’t provide it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t seek it out.  Schedule outings with friends, call someone up, get a network of friends online.  All of these can be lifelines.

I hope you have learned a bit about words and their importance over the past few weeks.  I’m looking at new topics, but if anyone has a suggestion, please write it in the comments.  I’d love to hear from all of you what things you struggle with or need some spiritual insights on.

For now… have a great weekend!

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